Yesterday was the 6th month anniversary of my grandma. We went to pay respects to her in the morning at the memorial.
In the afternoon, I took an afternoon nap, and I dreamt of her. I think this is the second time I dreamt of her. The first time I dreamt of her was shortly after her death. In the first dream, my family was in this holiday van/bus, and I was seated beside her. Somehow there was something wrong with the vehicle and we were going to meet with an accident. My family members started screaming at me to put on my safety belt and yelling at me to fasten my grandma's safety belt. I kept yelling at her, AH MAH AH MAH, PUT THE SAFETY BELT ON!! But in the dream, she refused. She just smiled at me. It was as if she was telling me it was time for her to go.
In today's dream, I dreamt that it was real time, that I was waking up from my nap, and my family was screaming at me, to faster come out to the living room. And on the sofa, I saw my grandma sitting there, smiling at me. My family members were screaming, "SARAH SARAH!! 阿嬷没有死!! 阿嬷回来了!!" I couldn't believe my eyes. I walked towards her, I touched her. She was donned in this jade green long-sleeved blouse. She smiled at me. I started crying. And then I woke up with a choked sob and with tears streaming down my face. I think I've only cried twice or thrice in my dreams - once was dreaming about my cousin-in-law passing away, and another is this. It felt so real. Too real to be true.
In the past couple of months, the grief has slowly faded, and sometimes I find memories of my grandma fading away. I really miss her a lot. She is my forever queen.
In the afternoon, I took an afternoon nap, and I dreamt of her. I think this is the second time I dreamt of her. The first time I dreamt of her was shortly after her death. In the first dream, my family was in this holiday van/bus, and I was seated beside her. Somehow there was something wrong with the vehicle and we were going to meet with an accident. My family members started screaming at me to put on my safety belt and yelling at me to fasten my grandma's safety belt. I kept yelling at her, AH MAH AH MAH, PUT THE SAFETY BELT ON!! But in the dream, she refused. She just smiled at me. It was as if she was telling me it was time for her to go.
In today's dream, I dreamt that it was real time, that I was waking up from my nap, and my family was screaming at me, to faster come out to the living room. And on the sofa, I saw my grandma sitting there, smiling at me. My family members were screaming, "SARAH SARAH!! 阿嬷没有死!! 阿嬷回来了!!" I couldn't believe my eyes. I walked towards her, I touched her. She was donned in this jade green long-sleeved blouse. She smiled at me. I started crying. And then I woke up with a choked sob and with tears streaming down my face. I think I've only cried twice or thrice in my dreams - once was dreaming about my cousin-in-law passing away, and another is this. It felt so real. Too real to be true.
In the past couple of months, the grief has slowly faded, and sometimes I find memories of my grandma fading away. I really miss her a lot. She is my forever queen.
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